Wednesday, September 8, 2010

I'm Lovin' it MY WAY!

I'm Lovin' it MY WAY!

As many of you know, I happen to be in love with Cheeseburgers. I think they are one of the best things life has to offer, right behind anal sex! And we all know anal sex is OH SO MMMMMM ... hell I feel like shoving my over sized cock in a tight little rectum just thinking about it. While eating a cheeseburger... HEAVEN!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, this is not to offend all fast food workers, but and yes there is always a but, some of those mother fuckers are just stupid as crack whore who offers a uniformed office a blow job for 5 bucks.

I just don't get it. How fucking hard is it to read a monitor that says NO MOTHER FUCKING ONIONS??? Really. When I order my food a certain way.. that is the way I should get it. I know people make mistakes, and if it happened just ONCE in a great while I would understand, but its ALL THE FUCKING TIME! GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK!!!!

So... I have made a decision. If it happens one more time, I am NO LONGER going to....

Hmmm Don't you EVEN think I was going to say "stop going". I wont ever do without my $1 dollar McDouble! HELL NAH!

What I am going to do is teach the bitch a lesson....

Next time My McDouble has Onions.. the bitch better watch herself cause this is what is gonna happen...


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Tuesday, September 7, 2010


asdfWhat time is it?

animated clock

It's time to




Ok. Here is the scenario: It's a drunken night at the bar... there have been three guys hitting on you all night and they want to take you home and fuck the holy shit out of you. (Well, lets hope you douche first so there is no actual shit left behind on the sheets.) Each guy wants you to himself... there is not going to be any three ways..four ways going down. Just YOU and ONE of these men. They are all different types, but each posses one quality another doesn't have.

Guy # 1

He has the face and the body that you consider your "DREAM GUY" in the "looks" department but he has a VERY small dick. The guys is also a TOP ONLY. There will be no assaulting his anus. (so dont try cheating)

So basically he would look something (but insert him with what your dream guy looks like)

ANd his cock.. well it looks a little something like this.....

GUY # 2

Guy two isn't the hottest guy to look at... he isn't your type, but he has one of the nicest dicks you will ever have shoved deep up in your man cunt. He will hit your prostate with each stroke and make you cream without even touching your cock.

He looks a little something like this....

(I know this guy isnt bad looking.. so use yoru imagination! LOL)

But his cock.............

Guy # 3

This guy should be at the Bingo hall and not at the gay bar, but none the less he is there and ready to put every inch of his 80 year cold deep within your rectal walls. This might not sound like such a great idea, but if you do the deed with him you will not only be walking away with that OLD PERSON smell and dusty cum shooting out of your ass, but you will also be walking away with $5000.00.


So there are your choices for the night. Just remember you are VERY VERY drunk and you do in fact plan on going home and letting one of these men FUCK YOU TILL YOU BLEED... .so dont give me that.. NONE of the above bullshit. PICK ONE BITCHES!!!

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Monday, September 6, 2010

There has been many times that people have asked me. Is having anal sex safe? Will it ruin your asshole? Will your shit just fall out?

The answer....

But that is if you are only taking smaller things up your ass



FRUITS AND VEGTABLES (excluding Melons)

Small to Medium things around the house

So as you see, these are all smaller items that can be shoved up that shit hole that wont let your asshole fall out in further time. So have at... shove all these things up your ass and don't have that worry on your mind that you will be wearing depends by the time you are 30.
They will keep that rectum look TIGHT and SWEET for those who want your BROWN EYE TREAT!

Now.. On the other hand. There are things that you might want to reconsider when finding the next thing that will go up your fuck hole....

Such as..

Sex Toys that take more than one hand to carry.


(Bowling Pin)

and Last but not least.





Now if you decide to against my advice and shove ANYTHING and EVERYTHING you can find up your MAN CUNT, then dont be bitching when you go to far and a couple brown logs fall out your hole..

So keep shoving those things up there and one day you will have your very own Grand Canyon for ALL to EXPLORE

And then... You will even be able to do magic tricks with your anus..

Like.. You know... Pushing the inner linings of it out for everyone to see!!!

Go Ahead.. Give them their Rosebud.

So there you go! Another Questioned answered by the all knowing of the anus.. MATT KANSAS!!!!



HEY... make sure that you click the FOLLOW button on the right of this blog... that way.. you wont miss out on what I have to say in the future! MUAHAHHAHHA

Oh yeah.. and make sure you "LIKE" this post so I can see how many people actually read this.

Sunday, September 5, 2010


What would you do if a guy pulled his cock out and it looked like this? Would YOU demand he bottom? Or would you try to take every last inch of it??

Hey! I have a big favor to ask of everyone also.. it takes like 30 seconds to do and would be a HUGE help. You need to be on facebook to help out so if you dont have a facebook account.. nevermind.

My boyfriend entered a contest on the Binaca Breath spray facebook page. He has a chance to win and Apple IPAD. Whoever has the most likes on their pic when the contest ends on the 20th of this month wins! He is in the lead right now and we gotta keep him there.

To vote is simple.

1st - Just go to Binaca Facebook page and "LIKE" thier fan page.

Then Go to his picture uploaded on their page and "LIKE" his photo.

Here is the link to his picture.

That's all it takes.. and you could help us out to win!!!

Thank you so much for those who take a moment to do this for me..