Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Diet Plan Made Easy


I did opt to not pack any bathroom supplies. Ima just buy that shit in Kansas. I'm just feeling to lazy. I don't have to be to the airport till 3pm so That is a plus..

I hope like hell they do not sit me next to a man that needs a seat belt extender. If that ever happens again I am sitting my fucking ass on the floor. Or I will go sit in one of the shitters for the whole flight.

Ya know they were talking about making people pay more for their flight by weight..I am wondering if I get a discount for being such a skinny little bastards. Oh wow you are only 139lbs.. You get 20% discount! YAYAYA Thanks bitches.

I know a lot of you are asking.. How do you stay so damn thin.. Well I have a very rigerous weight loss plan that I follow...


1 Can of Dr Pepper and 3 tic tacs.


1 20oz bottle of Dr Pepper and 2 Crackers. UNSALTED.


A One Liter Dr Pepper and 1 Rice Cake (two if you had an exhausting day)

For in between meals when your stomach if growling like a mother fucker.. just grab a piece of EXTRA GUM! It comes in Many flavors so its like you are having a new treat each time.

Right before you go to bed.. Go to the bathroom..
Stick your finger down your throat and get rid of anything lurking in your stomach. Food sitting around in the stomach while your sleeping can make you fat.

There you have it. My diet plan made easy. With these steps.. You NEVER have to exercise. And you can stay lean and trim for years to come.

1 comment:

  1. Eating healthy is probably the easiest and most important way in which you can keep active and shield yourself from the many diseases that are now common as we grow older, including heart disease and diabetes.