One Dollar Flip Flops
I LOVE flip flops. I do not care how trashy people say they are. How out of style they may become, or any other shit talking that comes along with wearing them. They are comfy!
I think by far the most comfy flip flops are the cheap ones. I have probably 15 pairs of flips, just because they are my thing.
When I heard that Old Navy was doing a $1 dollar flip flop sale Saturday, I knew I had to go get me some. The only problem was I wasn't going to be able to get there till 5 pm. That is why I went to an Old Navy that is not really that busy of a store. It sits back in a shopping center that I am surprised isn't out of business yet.
When I arrived at the store, I walked in and the store was pretty busy, but there were not shit tons of people at the checkout so I was glad to see that I wouldn't be in line forever.
I took my ass back to the men's section to get my fab dollar flops... and this is what I see....
Oh Hell NO! These bitches were sold the fuck out! UGH! I was all kinds of sad that I wasn't going to my cheap ass flops!
I decided to go ahead and take a gander around the store since there was other shit on sale also.
While I was checking out the swimwear, out comes this lady pushing a rack full of flip flops!! YAYYY I thought.
Then.. OMG! A fucking stampede began to ensue. I have never seen so many fat black woman run for anything other then Popeye's Chicken! And here they were stampeding through the Old Navy after these 1 dollar flip flops. I was scared!
I about got knocked over! They were not about to let a skinny little white boy get in their way for their treasures!
They had that rack of flip flops turned over and all over the place, digging for their sizes. I heard one big lady bitching that she couldn't find any size 11. Damn big foot was pissed!!!
It was only a matter of seconds that all those flip flops were gone. Then more workers began to bring out more boxes of the dollar treats. I walk over and ask where the men's are.
There were none on the truck. It was ALL women's shoes. None for the guys. WHAT A FUCKING BUNCH OF SHIT.
There I stood.. Looking at all these fat bitches rummaging through box after box of one dollar old navy flip flops and none for me. I was heart broken.
So I decided since I didn't get my fucking flip flops I might as well buy something. So I didn't feel as if my time was completely wasted.
I went back and finished browsing the men's board shorts. The problem.. the same problem I always have with old navy.. is the Mens stuff is just to big for me.
I trolled on over the boys section to check out their board shorts. Maybe something there would fit me....
Plus.... They were Cheaper!
As I looked around.. I found a pair... I thought hey were cute and you know how egotistical I am and how I need lots of attention that I decided to get the brightest fucking pair they had! I NEED TO BE NOTICED.... SO I HAVE BEEN TOLD RECENTLY?
Here they are..
$10 bucks! OH YEAH BABY! I love me some cheap shit.
They fit quite well.. the only problem was.... that inside netting in swim trunks.. OH MY! I couldn't even pull them over my ass because of it.. I had to cut that shit out. Problem solved with the scissors. It's like I am a seamstress!
SO there you have it... Fucking Old Navy didn't even have enough shit in stock to accommodate the masses. They should have given my gay ass a rain check!
Hey at least the trip wasn't totally a waste. I wasn't about to let it. I mean just watching those crazy bitches go after the flip flops was worth it enough.